Question : Relationship Advice- To move or not to move?
Hi, So I’ve been in a relationship for 3 years now. We care about each a lot and we have a lot of fun together. My boyfriend and I both just graduated from college. I went to school for film and he went to school for fiance. I come from a very dysfunctional family and I only keep in contact with two of my 6 siblings. I have been living on my own for two years now. I have an apartment and live by myself. I have worked my ass off trying to live and pay for school. He lives with his dad who is pretty well off and his little brother. His dad pays for everything and his family lives quite comfortably. He doesn’t understand a lot of what I go through but he has all ways gone above and beyond to show his support. His brother is his best friend and we he’s not with me he’s with him and when we make plans to go out he always invites him. I get along with his brother very well so sometimes I don’t mind. But it gets really annoying and we have gotten into fights over it. That was our biggest problem until now. His step mom died shortly after we started dating and his dad moved on pretty quickly. His dad has been dated this girl (its a long distance relationship might I add) for two years and proposed this past christmas (And I’m supposed to be the one with the dysfunctional family). So that was a huge ordeal. To make it worse they announced last month that they have decided they want to move to Florida ASAP. Btw we live just outside of Boston. They have already put both houses up for sale and put in offers for houses in FL. My bf has decided he wants nothing to do with moving to FL with them. We have thrown around the idea of moving in together since we started of our last year of college and we talked about it seriously shortly after the engagement. Now all of a sudden he tells me that he doesn’t want to live in Boston anymore. He always says Boston is one of his least favorite cities out of every city he has visited (He’s been to every state in the continental US). I told him that I don’t have anything preventing me from moving except having a career is very very important to me. My field is very location sensitive so the only cities I’ve ever thought of moving to is New York and possible LA. He told me he wants to go to Atlanta, St Louis, Las Vegas possibly Miami his dad is looking into Northern FL. He has his reasons for picking each city, their not random. Regardless I blew up and told him that is so selfish. I have done come research and there isn’t much of film scene in any of those places. Except maybe Vegas which looks like its on the same level as boston, and there isn’t much going on here right now. He said he doesn’t want to limit his options and now has no reason or desire to stay in boston except me. He wants me to start looking for jobs in those cities and move with him. He is so dead set on this because he said he will never be happy in Boston and he wont compromise with me. If I don’t move I’m not sure either one of us is the long distance relationship type especially since we spend so much time together now and then all of a sudden we wont. I really don’t think we would make it. I love him so much, but I do not want to give up having the type of career I want for guy. But I also don’t want to lose him. So thats the whole long story…. what do you think?
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Best answer:

Answer by denissnowy
If he is not prepared to compromise a little at this early stage, then get used to being number 2 in everything. Fine if he wants to leave Boston, but if you cant influence where next, forget your film career and see if Macdonalds is hiring.