Question : My mom lives with me and my 2 little boys, she doesn’t help with household expenses!?
My mom and I bought a house together (both of our names on the house) in May 2007. First payment was July 2007. I am the only one who has been paying for the mortgage ever since, and all the household expenses. So far I paid $ 28,100.00 for mortgage, escrow and interest! That’s right, twenty-eight thousand dollars! All my own money.

I get angry from time to time and get into argument with her for not helping with expenses. It feels like I’m carrying the house on my back and she’s sitting on the house! I confronted her that she cannot live here for free anymore! She has to start paying for something! (note that 6 mos ago I demanded her to take care of electric bills and she does that) So recently the last few days there was a really bad tension. I told her to start paying 1/3 of all household expenses (that’s mortgage, electricity, water, phone and home warranty) starting in October 1st. She was not happy and claimed that it is unfair!

Unfair!? Is it unfair? I need your help! What do you think I should do?? How do I figure this all out?? I’m getting out of this house (I will sell it next year) and not have to put up with her taking advantage of me. I’m struggling with high credit card debt and supporting my 2 boys on my own. I receive SSD for my both boys and myself. That’s not much, around $ 1300 a month. I do get child support weekly but I will not count that as income. I don’t work because I’m going to school full time and am hoping to get a job after I graduate in May (out of Florida).

I hope to hear from you guys with answers! I need to type up an agreement for me and my mom to sign that from October 1st and on, this is how much we would pay for our expenses,..fairly!

Another thing: I count my boys and myself as 3 in a household (head of house). My mom count herself as 1 in a household (single). That’s how we do it on our tax return, regardless that we (4 of us) live together in 3 bedroom 2 bath house. I think 1/3 of household expense is fair enough for her to pay because I consider my 2 boys together as 1 adult, so there’s 3 of us, split 1/3 each. What do you think?

Any advice would be so much appreciated! Thank you!!
~Carm
florida home warranty

Best answer:

Answer by letterstoheather
I think it’s only fair your mother pays something every month. After all, you’re not rich, and are trying to raise a couple of kids…

We all need to pitch in and help when we can. And not many people i know live somewhere for free.

If she were my mom i’d insist in a calm and caring, but firm way that she must help with household expenses. I would let her know that you don’t want financial problems to cause stress and tension in your household and relationship, and that you want to work this out in a fair, equitable way for each of you.

I would probably let her know that since it’s her house too, then she has to be responsible for X dollars each month. Then i’d give her the option to let me know what date is convenient for her to pay her portion every month.

I hope this works out. I’m sure it’s not easy for you, and it would probably take a bit of a load off you financially when she starts helping. And she needs to. She’s a grown up.